Do you ever feel jealous? I know most, if not all, can say yes. I do. I don’t like to admit it though. Jealousy is icky. It speaks of our dissatisfaction with our selves in some ways. Inherent in jealousy is a desire for the other to have less, be torn down. We don’t want the good to be happening to the other person, we want good happening to us. I notice when I am jealous that I feel a darkness growing inside of me. It can become consuming. I hide the part of me that is motivated by a drive toward the common good and shift into a drive toward my good exclusively. I believe jealousy and selfishness go hand in hand. They suffocate the energy we could be using to pursue our passion.
What to do when we’re jealous? I move toward the person in my thoughts and heart. I think about what I’m doing. “Hmmm, why am I feeling this negative stuff toward this person? Why don’t I want good for him? I want good for myself and somehow I think if he has good in his life I can’t have good in mine.” Reality says there is plenty of good to go around. You can achieve your goals and I can achieve my goals and complete strangers can achieve their goals, and on and on. So I shift my thinking. “I want good for me and I know others can have good too.” I start praying for good things to happen to the person or I express thankfulness for the good that is happening in his life. It’s amazing how this simple act frees me from the oppression of jealousy and selfishness. This isn’t a “once and done” exercise. I have to repeat it every time I feel jealous. The more I do it, the more natural it becomes.
When I’m free from jealousy I have unhindered energy to pursue my passion.